The Age says you are fat, and take drugs when nervous!

''It's quite clear that we got ourselves through this recession by binging on drinks, drugs and burgers"

The marvelous sensationalists of Australian leftist media outlet, The Age are at it again. From a single survey and two purported 'experts' Richard Webb has deduced that during the Global Financial Crisis Australians "...painted on a happy face, popped a few pills then buried our sorrows in booze and junk food."

But whats even weirder is the way this 'journalism' (if you could call it that) somehow manages to metamorphosis into an Apple plug:

''We are about a year off open warfare between new technology and old,'' he says. He predicts that in two to three years' time this transition will reach a tipping point, ''then everyone will have to have a Kindle or an iPad''.

In year 9 Richard, I was continually reminded how important it was to link paragraphs in a piece, but hey! if a writer for the Age doesn't have to do it then why should I?

Nice work Richard


Cynically written by Floyd (with linking paragraphs)

article can be found here

How we joined the zombie horde...

You can now follow us on twitter! Rejoice:

https://twitter.com/SatireSpot


Yours Truthfully,

Floyd & Yoji

Update: Dave the Banker

In an about face possibly due to public pressure, Macquarie Bank has spared mid employee David Kiely, affectionately labeled 'Dave the banker' by media outlets. Dave rose to notoriety after scrolling through pics of Miranda Kerr

All we can say is, what next? Porn policy at your workplace? Sounds good :)

Is it possible to agree with Hitler?

Hitler was right about one thing, the iPad sucks...
Disagree? drop a comment

Do you have your rights at Work...to view porn?

Media outlets such as The Age and Herald Sun have jumped on recent controversy enveloping unfortunate Macquarie employee, David Kiely who was sprung during a live telecast "...looking at semi-nude pictures of Australian model Miranda Kerr on his computer..."

You can see Kiely left, caught in the act

But as online group, Here Is The City, launches an online campaign to save the job of procrastinating Kiely, Several questions come to mind: is Keily liable if Macquarie aren't filtering undesirable sites, is he really just one of millions of lazy, desperate accountants worldwide and is Aussie Miranda Kerr just too damn irresistible? Time will tell...

Floyd

PC monster strikes again!

Titles such as barman and waitress are now gradually being phased out in yet another insane crusade for 'Political Correctness'

Take a look for yourself:

Politically Correct Job Titles

1. Beverage Dissemination Officer - Barman
2. Colour Distribution Technician - Painter & Decorator
3. Customer Experience Enhancment Constultant - Shop Assistant
4. Domestic Technician - Housewife
5. Education Centre Nourishment Consultant - Dinner Lady
6. Highway Environmental Hygienist - Road Sweeper
7. Field Nourishment Consultant - Waitress
8. Five a Day Collection Operative - Fruit Picker
9. Front Line Customer Support Facilitator - Call Centre Worker
10. Gastronomical Hygiene Technician - Dish Washer
11. Mass Production Engineer - Factory Worker
12. Media Distribution Officer - Paper Boy
13. Mobile Sustenance Facilitator - Burger Van Worker
14. Mortar Logistics Engineer - Labourer
15. Product Replenishment Officer - Shelf Stacker
16. Recycling Operative - Bin Man
17. Sanitation Consultant - Toilet Cleaner
18. Subterranean Fossil Fuel Engineer - Miner
19. Transparency Enhancement Facilitator - Window Cleaner
20. Vehicle Restoration Engineer - Panel Beater


thanks to http://www.affiliatedragon.compolitically-correct-job-titles/

Taking conservation to a new err.. 'level '